through it all, thick and thin, bruises and cuts, God is there with me. He knows when i'm anxious (sometimes for the wrong reasons), He knows when i'm feeling empty and struggling to fight the devil's insinuation, He knows my worries. So what can i do but turn to Him in prayer and submission, knowing well that He guards my heart and mind with His cloak of peace, comfort, righteousness and control, so that things become fittingly right.

i guess sometimes it matters to me - results. Its mainly due to this innate competitiveness that i have. It matters - a good showing for IPPT which is highlighted by an impressive 2.4km run timing; a stellar SOC performance. when its apparent that what i've achieved is good enough, i crave to do even better. So pressure starts to exert from both sides - my own wanting to improve on my previous showings; the expectation to maintain my pole position in front of others. See that sinfulness? totally lost it, no sense of purpose that is God-centered. totally. But more often than not i'm ceaselessly reminding myself to put in my best effort for God, to measure how far i can go pushing myself, but still its hard to locate my own limits. its a real spiritual tussle for me to know that i'm veered towards self glory. I just wish i can be alone in taking all these tests, disposing of the presence of sinful mentalities.

i do thank God for fine results, for it is given by Him. So i trust that at the end of the day, i will see a stronger person who's ready to handle God's work in the ministry with much tenacity.

again, what a joy to be around with Christians!
Vin