i'm so weak now.
i'm shocked, much to my horror, i woke up today, and felt pain at my hips and lower back.my guess, the reason for the pain: yesterday's PE lesson.
and i puzzled, never in my life before have i felt pain at those areas.

its horrendous, its disappointing you know. i merely sprinted 3 rounds around the track and ran for another 1km. AND I FEEL PAIN THIS MORNING? that shows how weak i am now.

my softened condition now pales in comparison with mine years back.
when i would complain that training is so tough, i mean, it really is.
and find excuses so i can miss training.
at least 3 times weekly, when i would drag my feet through the doors , worry about it when i'm having exams.
when i would tow my bruised, ripped and gashed body which is near paralysis or shredded state, home. (i'm not exaggerating here) Now that really is tough, and it accounts for the consistent, nagging pain in my muscles for ever so frequently, at almost every part of my body.
After a year i've gotten used to it, and have 'adapted' to the pain, e.g how to walk when your leg muscles are painful. so the pain isn't publicly shown - i gritted my teeth so as to prevent my parents from realising the painfulness i was going through.
i shouldn't go on..
that lasted for 3-4 years, an agonizing regime.

i'm so disgusted with myself with the confirmation that i'm so weak now, i mean, i realised that, but didnt want to accept that, but after today, much to my sadness, i admit it.
it spells the decline of the physical me. AHH!!

write me off
alvin chia