after doing much contemplating, pacing nervously up and down the house, i've made the decision not to book in tonight, but to spend one more night at home. i've put away my concerns that my preparations and packing for Alert-Red Operations aren't complete yet. So i'll go in at 630am tomorrow to do my final prep.

Alert-Red Op: we are put on standby for the nation's sake. which means, we are supposed to be ready to move off for war or security operations when activated in real.
i'm on standby starting Tuesday till May. In between there will be a period of 2 weeks in March when i'll be confined in camp.

Watched the mens finals of the Aussie Open today, which i thoroughly enjoyed. except that the player i'm rooting for lost. why is it that the player i support always end up losing in front of me when i'm watching them play live? horrendous. hate it.

i'm just thinking. how do we challenge someone to think about their faith. do we do so with a soft hand approach, active on the outside, but passively apprehensive within, building up that relationship/anchor that friendship 1st before we even begin to touch on issues on faith. i'm thinking that sometimes a loud and clear challenge is needed. i remember what Pastor Teoh said in his sermon last week - when a person has the Holy Spirit in him, the Spirit will cause the person to listen to God and change his life. So a definite challenge from the Word of God(Bible) is most effective. Of course, we must apply the right amount of gentleness in doing so. I firmly believe that the Spirit will work in his conscience.

Acts 17:31 In the past God overlooked such ignorance, but now he commands all people everywhere to repent.

Ok, i'll pray for those who've 'left' the church, who was once among us on a frequent basis.

pray for christopher, he's been having frequent headaches throughout the week.

Vin

for all i've been training for all these while

i've finally got my men yesterday. i pray that i may get to know them better and open up to them too :)

friday was a crazy day. to symbolize the handing over of men to new commanders, all of the new commanders had to endure through a consecutive string of 13 PT exercises from 1230pm to 6pm. crazy right? under the sun and feeling the heat in full force. for example, doing push ups on a scorching ground left many with blistered palms. how unforgiving and ruthless. for one time during the exercises i thought i was about to faint.

immediately after that, with our boots all soggy, when we looked as if we had just escaped from a war in Malaysia by swimming ashore and crawling up the East Coast beach, we had the handover parade. haha... apparently i've been handpicked (all companies fight and want the best commanders for themselves) by the commanders coz my profile is being scrutinized by them. SAF knows nothing about privacy here huh. OC (biggest shot in company) came up to me and said , 'i've heard much good things about you', my old commander and men ALL knew that i'm an IPPT gold award holder, apparently the OC revealed it to them. yesterday my platoon commander surprised me, 'let me guess, are you from gymnastics?'. i can figure out that my dossier was passed around like one will do with photographs at a house of a guest.

still, its hard to meet their expectations. haha... i don't think they know how lousy of a commander i am even though i may be physically good.

its sinking in slowly, the fact that i now have to lead men. pray for courage and wisdom. not gonna be easy, i have to be on my toes.

thats it, its been a tiring week. its heartwarming after a long day to receive smses from friends who're by my side encouraging me. thank God for those.
Vin

for the record

by the grace of God i'm still alive.

even though the world has gone tipsy a little bit.

to my absolute delight, unheralded Jo-Wilfred Tsonga - no, he's not a new breed of mosquito but actually a tennis player carrying the French flag, but of African blood. for the record, there are like countless french people i know who's of the African heritage. Zizou(Zidane) - Algeria, Gael Monfils - country X of Africa, and i'm sure many others who've made the news out there who i'm unable to recall now. i think its a trend, you know, just like fashion, when people all over the world are chasing after everything french. its called, erm, francophilia? apparently UAE is actually going to create a french city in Abu Dhabi too, China is doing likewise, with plans of bringing the world renowned Lourve to homesoil by recreating a duplicate of the pyramidal monument. absolutely crazy. have you ever considered eating snails as gross? but why does it fetch such a high price for its value, similar to that of local Abalone as high grade delicacy? and to think that we are even called upon to appreciate its flavour and taste. all because its French! the French says that coagulated blood is pricey and classy. so we all nod our heads to that, but shake our heads when people just don't get it. ooh la la.

thats quite a digress. back to tennis! Tsonga thrashed Nadal so badly in straight sets, i think Nadal looked so bad with all beefy, buffed, bulging glistening muscles all pegged as a weapon of intimidation. He's gunned down by sheer power and boldness of Tsonga. To add to that drama, Serbia formally sounded their arrival, just as the Russian contingent did a couple of years back- but with a smaller strength size, citizens who're loyal and proud of the nation they represent, great personalities, lesser leggy blonds, but cute Eastern Euorpean charm with a daring sense of humour. Even Shao Ning has come under its spellbinding charm. Novak Djokovic, Jelena Jankovic, Ana Ivanovic, Tipsarevic. victorious in many sections these 2 weeks at the Aussie Open. Namely, Djokovic derailed the Federer Express convincingly and brutally, and Ivanovic reaching her 2nd Grand Slam finals but losing tamely to sharapova. i really really really really really really really really hate, ooops, dislike sharapova. for a note: Federer is a living tennis legend- like Tiger Woods or Micheal Shumacher, only that he's showing no signs of letting up yet, many more Grand Slams to come i'm sure. Sharapova is not a queen.

ok. Aussie Open coming to an end. all final round matches have been strangely won in straight sets, so ticket holders must have cursed by their oohs and aahs that none of those have been an epic which will be worth their pennies, but leaving nonetheless satisfied because of the uncompromising quality of play. EVERYTHING I HAVE MISSED. But my soul is back to catch the final event of it all tomorrow night(tonight) - Novak v Tsonga. mark this its gonna be special. coz you won't see a Nadal or a Federer.

for the record, i booked out at 1130pm today, took a lift from a friend to Tanah Merah MRT to find out that the last train is gone, took bus 2 to Bugis, then boarded a cab for home.

oh ya, to my shock and double, triple shock, Arsenal went down 5-1 to bitter rivals Tottenham, i almost couldn't concentrate on the day's activities (i sure pinched myself many times that day) . Arsenal has redeemed themselves immediately with a 3-0 win over Newcastle.

forgive me if you don't understand anything i've written at all. i'm writing off my mind simply.

its amazing i'm writing this at this hour
Vin with passion

separation is painful. Death is unavoidable.

JiaRen's death reminds me that our lives are in the Lord - Acts 17. Only, but most regretable thing was how sudden it happened. what have i done to extend the care spurred on by the love of God to allow for it to spill over to the lives of others.

i'm shocked and shaken.

lets invest on eternal things, build our faith to be strong to withstand the test of fire on Judgment Day. Lets be a Christian who is bearing fruits.

Vin

sigh

i'm frustrated. please pray that i'll have more faith in God.

I've dragged my heavy heart back to Bedok camp yesterday, the storm followed our hour long journey spanning almost the entire length of the PIE.

sigh... i dun wish to continue.

i dunno how to put it down here leh. my heart is so heavy.

Vin

She'll be missed

WaiYin was saying yesterday how much she'll miss Edna when she goes to China at the end of the month. wow. they must be really close sisters! Because of a common faith in Christ, Christians naturally share deeper feelings for one another. I'll miss the bubbly Edna too! haha... she is like the most bubbly girl in church, always beaming and smiling, and dedicated in her work and faithful to her friends.

In my most recent memory, she'll pounce in our faces, cabaret fashion, chipmunks style, and exclaim 'Welcome to Ngee Ann Poly!' to wide eyed visitors when the lift door opened.

We all love Edna!
Vin

life is fulfilling when we live out our intended purposes which God has set for us. I mean, when i look at how i've spent my time on Saturdays going for ministry activities and being occupied with ministry work, i don't regret at all. Because its a worthy investment. There's a cost to that of course, when you've got to learn to turn down gatherings, meet ups over meals, movie, ice cream... Sometimes i don't really know what to say or explain what i've always been up to on Saturdays, but the truth is, i've got work to do.

Of course the slot after church service is available. Maybe its laziness, but i wanna share some light hearted moments with my fellow Christian mates. So there.

Australian Open 2008 starts tomorrow. Arsenal slipped and relinquished their top position in the league. Liverpool is lost. Manchester United's form looking unstoppable. Chelsea seems like the underdog. Derby is in such pitiful state i think they're wishing they can be relegated early.

Vin

today was a fruitful day.

thank God for the good harvest during St E today, my student & I shared to 8 people! i think that number is a record for St E on Saturday. Its usually harder to catch students on Saturdays, its easier to contact students when they are in uniform, on their way back to home. Thank God for He provides opportunities.

1 lesson i've reminded myself today. Just do my job and share bravely. we approached 2 groups of guys- consisting of a pair and a threesome. both i'd presumed that they will not want to stay and listen, or maybe they're the kind that made me feel, 'they'll just excuse themselves and run off after i start on the gospel'. the group of three was quite difficult to control initially, so i was thinking that they'll probably not take in what i'm going to share to them. Thank God for He has shown that He's in control. So to my surprise they listened and responded. The three guys are even interested to meet for EBS. thank God! its wonderful.

This week can be marked down as a rarity when i was able to attend the full band practice sessions. Friday night's practice ended in such a disarray condition, but things tidied up drastically today. haha... huEy crashed some parts into me when we were walking home and we did a raw practice at her void deck. haha... i'm amazed at how everything dovetailed into a neat(er) worship presentation, given how much that needs to be corrected and rehearsed at such a short time. By the grace of God.

My gripe: no more songs that have been recently inducted into the Top-10-all-time-favourites-that-woship-leader-will-choose-to-sing.

oh man, there are a few movies out there i've been waiting to watch.
Vin

2 weeks back at Pasir Laba camp was a respite. being uprooted from Guards Conversion Course(GCC), when my friends have passed out after a gruelling field summation exercise as of yesterday, and formally assimiliated into the elite Guards family and rightfully earning their khaki beret and guards tab. i was quite relieved i missed that, a friend sent this shivering sms, 'my whole body is rotting'.

My 2 weeks at Pasir Laba camp i had to attend this GPMG commanders course. so, tadah, i'm a GPMG commander! GPMG is machine gun, very big and heavy. thank God coz i won't have 6 men under me but only 2 men, haha... i think the Lord knows i can't control 6 men. I've enjoyed nights off with the guys haha, we went to the revamped IMM and treated ourselves with Secret Recipe! goodness, the Royal Chocolate was super nice la, similar to the popular Chocolate Amer that huEy and Co. surprised me with an hour before 2008 :) yesterday the entire course dug 1 GPMG trench and we couldn't complete it, coz the ground is like so tough - made up of mostly rocks. when the blade is jabbed down, sparks will fly. i'm serious, digging the trench reminds me of the consequence of man's sinfulness, as a result the ground is cursed and we are made to toil.

last week huEy surprised me yet again by sending a Beijing 2008 postcard from China! haha... so funny... the postcard read, 'BeiJing welcomes you'. thanks huEy! And notably i've added a 3rd Beijing 2008 pin to the collectibles thanks to SuYing. thanks too! Olympic fever man. Anyway S'pore stands a good chance of playing host to the Youth Olympics. Hope you'll catch the fever too :P

Going for StE now,
Vin